On My Way Back

I cant tell you how great it feels to be sitting here blogging. I have felt so icky the past 7 weeks, thats even moving a limb made me nauseous. So sitting here typing and feeling normal is HUGE for me!

Just to catch you up, here's what happened... I had some complications from the surgery which made me beyond sick to my stomach 24/7. Without being too graphic, lets just say I spent most of my time dry heaving and throwing up. My new stomach just wasnt healing. In turn, I became extremely dehydrated and malnourished. I had a major deficiency of potassium and other vitamins that my body desperately needed. I became extremely weak, developed an ulcer, and I had to be hospitalized. I had a PICC line inserted. Most of the veins in my hands had been blown from all my weekly visits to the hospital for EGD's in attempts to figure out why I was so nauseated. Plus, they were giving me some heavy duty nutrition and meds that normal veins in hands could not handle. That includes about 6 different kinds of anti-nausea medication, trying to find one that worked for me. Finally, on about the 4th day, they tried Zofran. Its a medication that is normally given to chemotherapy patients - and very strong. Its so strong - and expensive - that my insurance wouldnt pay for it until we wrote letters and got my surgeon to override their rule of only a limited amount of meds in a 30 day period. Its the only thing that has kept me from dry-heaving constantly and kept me out of the hospital for the past 6 days and I am feeling sooooo much better.

In fact, I am feeling SO much better that I actually have started eating. Yesterday I had some taco soup broth and a few small bites of some potato. It all stayed down with no problem! Today Im going to try yogurt. I still havent been able to muster up the bravery to try a protein drink. (Once you see one of those come back up...you do NOT want to try again.) If I can keep taco soup down, I know I can probably keep a chocolate protein drink down. However, if any of you have had a protein drink, you know how funky they smell. That smell is enough to get the tummy churning for me, ... Baby steps.... I'll get there.

Ive had a few people ask, "Was it worth it? Are you regretting it?" Being in the hospital, being sooo sick, missing my Juju bean, and being so miserable is not worth being thin by any means. But I did this not just to lose weight and be thin.... I did it to be healthy, to break a cycle of gaining, to prevent the perils that PCOS will have eventually handed me and in the long run, yes, I think it will be worth it. The past 7 weeks of recovery has been hell. But in the grand scheme of things, 7 weeks is really a blink of an eye.